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Nutshell Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "Melsner" journal:

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December 25th, 2011
09:51 am

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Merry Christmas!

Current Mood: happyhappy
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November 10th, 2011
01:19 am

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You sunk my childhood memories!
One of the nephews talked me into playing the board game "Battleship" with him. I figured it would be low stress, since I remembered it being a pretty simple, fun game from when I was a kid.

Holy crap, when, how and why did they make Battleship so freaking complicated??? It's not two separate boards anymore, it's one. And it's in this really weird hexagonal or octagonal layout now...

And did you know that there are now islands in Battleship now? Freaking islands? What the hell? And after you sink all the enemy ships, you're supposed to rescue a POW from one of the island.

WTF.

Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated
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April 22nd, 2011
12:48 pm

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"Goodbye, My Sarah Jane"

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March 14th, 2011
03:29 pm

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Disney Sucker Punch
I'd watch this movie...

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March 2nd, 2011
11:55 pm

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Stallion Semen served up as new energy drink in New Zealand
http://www.aolnews.com/2011/02/25/stallion-semen-served-up-in-new-zealand-as-new-energy-drink/

"You often hear from a female perspective that semen has an awful alkaline taste, so we thought we'd better make it more user friendly," explained horse trainer Lindsay Kerslake, whose stallions will supply the shots, according to The Australian.

"Think of it like a milkshake. ... It's all safe. We're getting the semen in the same way breeders do, using an artificial vagina and storing it in the formula they use."

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February 9th, 2011
12:45 am

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Sick and Tired
Dear Baby Jesus: I really want to stop coughing. Every time I think I'm getting better, the next day I have a nasty hacking cough episode until I think I'm going to puke.

Sigh. Might help if I took a vow of silence or something. Talking seems to irritate my throat.

To everyone just thought: "Melsner talking irritates everyone, why should his throat be different?" I say unto you, go screw. :)

Current Mood: sicksick
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November 15th, 2010
11:35 am

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Harry Potter is a geek
This is cute. Daniel Radcliffe is a big ol' giant nerd. But in the best way.

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November 10th, 2010
10:49 pm

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When the dog bites, when the bee stings...
Forgive me, but I can't quite tell this story in a linear order...

Today, I drove home to White Salmon to spend the night at my parents' house. That's because tomorrow, I've got a dentist appointment to get my tooth fixed.

Mother left White Salmon yesterday, because her birthday is on the 14th. It's her 70th birthday, so she wanted to treat herself by being several states away from Father.

Before I drove from Vancouver to White Salmon this afternoon, I called Father to let him know I was on my way. This is how it went.

Mike: I'm heading to White Salmon in a bit, Father.
Father: Ok, Son, that's good, that's good. I'm just popping over to Hood River for an ER follow up.
Mike: ...Um... what?
Father: Oh, the renter's dog bit me yesterday. I got ten stitches, but they wanted to check my hand for nerve damage and stuff.

For those who don't remember, my father has a tiny bit of brain damage. And his brain damage was somewhat worsened after a plane crash a few years ago. We rent our old house, but Father has a hard time with the concept that he can't just wander in whenever he wants.

So yesterday, he knocked on the old house's basement door, "because that's where I saw lights on." No one answered, so went in through the basement and went upstairs.

And got attacked by dogs.

Another fun detail of this story? Father was holding a new kitten at the time. He had gotten while driving to Trout Lake for lunch. Someone said, "Kitty?" And boom, new kitty.

Mother is not amused. She apparently is not convinced that he did a Surprise Catting as a birthday present. Ok, but she might have thought that the dog attack was a little funny.

EDIT: I should mention that Father is entirely unphased by the dog bite. He's very cheerful and mostly happy about having a new kitty.

Oh, we didn't have any kitty litter inside the house for the first 24 hours the new kitty was here... So I asked him where it had been going to the bathroom. He shrugged and said, "Dunno."

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September 23rd, 2010
11:24 am

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Sesame Street and True Blood. No, Really.
Ok. Wow. And, also, WTF?

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September 19th, 2010
11:23 am

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Avast!
It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day, matey!

Arr.

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